01 February 2009

Transcend: With You, Turtle.

Some days, I don't have the answers.

And that's OK. Because I don't need to have all the answers.

And some days, I don't even get the questions right. Or I run away
with my answers because I don't want to see the results of the test.
And when I'm in that state, there is nothing more that I want to do
than turtle. I pull my arms and legs and head back inside my shell,
and mutter under my breath "Why does no one save me?" I don't realize
that in the act of pulling into my shell, I've removed any ability for
me to move out of the crushing blows being reigned down on me by the
passing hordes. And when all I see is feet ready to crush me, it's
easier to pull inside where it's dark and I don't have to let the
world know how afraid I am - except that it's telegraphed by my very
state.

And then, when I've been safe and miserable in my shell for long
enough, I feel something strange - someone is picking me up. Moving
me away from the crowds of people. Now I can't move even if I did
have the courage to stick my head back out again. And after a while,
I am set down - away from the rush and the crush. And sometimes, when
I am lucky, I can see the sandals of the kind stranger who carried me
here, waiting for me to resume my journey.

And I still have no idea to navigate that crush the next time it comes
across my path. But somehow, someone always picks me up and carries
me to safety - not necessarily in the direction I thought I should be
heading, but towards a place I want to go. And I'm not there yet.

But that's OK... slow and steady finds this race won.

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