Transcend: Judgment

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

These verses are often quoted as a reminder; a reminder of what love truly is. Sometimes they can be heard at a marriage ceremony, and other times in a sermon. Sometimes they are reduced to a checklist or a to-do list.

God showed me something today. He showed me that we are often too critical and judgmental of ourselves. We are habitually harder on ourselves than we are on anyone else. He showed me that I can be gentle towards myself, because He loves me unconditionally, and His love is not based on performance. It’s not based on what I do wrong and what I do right. I realized that I don’t love myself the same way. My self-love is often determined by my performance.

What would it look like to love ourselves the way these verses talk about?

What if we were more patient and kind with ourselves? What if we kept no record of our own wrongs?

The Word also teaches us to love our neighbor as ourselves. If we learned to be less judgmental toward ourselves, wouldn’t we also learn to love others in a more meaningful way?

I have heard it said that our outer world reflects our inner world. That can sound like a lot of pressure, but we can take it one day at a time. We can learn to be gentler with ourselves.

Transcend: My Plans

Today wasn’t supposed to go this way.

I woke up tired and annoyed. I started reasoning in my head, making up reasons why people just didn’t seem to appreciate me or respect my time. I knew that my thinking was stinking and I didn’t want to go there, but the harder I tried to avoid it, the harder it seemed to be to get away from it.

After I dropped off my roommate, I proceeded to run some errands. First stop: car wash. Second stop: haircut. As I’m returning to my vehicle, I see that my spare tire cover is gone. I figured that I should go back to the car wash and check there, but first I decided to go to Staples to pick up a couple of items. Found the jewel cases but no CD mailers. Then I went back to the car wash, and was able to retrieve my tire cover (*phew*). I proceeded to another Staples location to see if I could find CD mailers, but to no avail. It was just around that time that I realized that my hairdresser had not done what I had requested, even though I must have specified 2 or 3 times.

I feel like I would be better able to cope with days like this if I weren’t as tired, or if I was in a better mood, but they always seem to happen on the days I wake up on the wrong side of the bed.

I realize that as long as I’m living, I can’t really avoid situations like this. I realize these are petty things, and in the grand scheme of things it doesn’t mean that my day was a failure.

Regardless, I feel like I could have done a better job of keeping my peace. There’s no reason to get irritated and annoyed when we have yet to arrive and we are still on our way to where we are going. The journey may not be as glamorous as the destination, but if we can’t enjoy the journey, then we may not appreciate the destination as much either.

Transcend: The Host

You’ve been planning for months. You’ve been waiting and working for weeks. When you go to bed at night, you dream of it. When you’re awake, you can’t wait to get some free time to work on it.

What I’m speaking of is, of course, the party. You’ve all been to one. Those amazing parties, that end the next day... or the next night... or the next week. Where stories are told, where people whisper about the legendary things that happened. Everything is magnified a million times under the influence of the people, the music, the night.

And now, it’s your turn. You’re hosting the party. The party to end all parties. You finally got a new place, and you’ve been working, working. The place is spotless - even though you know it’ll be a dump the next day. The invitations have all been sent out - Facebook friends, emails, old acquaintances, work buddies - and everyone is coming. Even your old friends from across the country are flying in to say hi.

You’ve got the food and the drinks, and the music playlist, and gone out and scraped pennies together to get more hangers for your front hall closet so you can fit everyone’s coat in. There’s wood for the firepit in the back yard, spare rooms ready for those friends that need to sleep over, and you’re ready to go.

You put on the music and sit by the front door - not wanting to appear too eager, but wanting so much to see your friends - some you saw yesterday, and some you haven’t seen for years. You're sweaty and nervous, even though you wouldn’t admit it to anyone.

The first guests arrive. It’s your best friend and his girlfriend. Then more show up. Old friends. New friends. You’ve barely said hi to the last group when the doorbell rings again and more come in. People bring gifts - for the house, for the party - food, and fun times. The girls take over the front room and start swapping stories. Some guys go out back and get the fire started. A spontaneous round of singing West Side Story breaks out. And there’s still more guests coming. Everyone’s here. Friends have invited friends. You’re bursting to the rafters, yet there always seems to be room for more. When you’re about to run out of food, someone comes with a trunk full.

The night carries on - swapping stories, having fun - this is the place to be, everyone agrees. You can’t get more then three feet without someone stopping you to give you a handshake or a hug and say “great party man!”

You go outside to say hi to the folks around the firepit. They’re all having a great time - people coming in, coming out. Suddenly, a burst of people come flooding out. “You have to see this! You haven’t seen this amazing room this guy has! Hey, is it OK if I show them that killer rec room?”

You nod, ecstatic. This was your ace up your sleeve. No one has been over and seen the room - designed for parties, for the best of the best. Games of all sort, music playing, the coolest couches anyone has ever seen - you redid the whole entire basement into the ultimate party lounge.

Everyone runs downstairs - you finish up, putting out the fire, smiling to yourself. You can’t help but do a little victory dance. There’s no way this night could be any more perfect.

You reach the door to go back inside and open it up. You open it up. You try to open it up. It’s locked. And your keys are inside, in your room.

Someone must have locked it accidentally. Oh well, someone will walk by - it’s a glass door, after all, and you can see through it. Or you can call someone... with your cell phone... also in your room.

You tap on the door, trying to get someone’s attention. No one notices.

You bang on the door, trying to get someone to notice. No one’s paying attention. The music in the party room is so loud that no one can hear what’s going on outside.

Ah well, sooner or later someone will notice you’re not there and come looking. So you pull out a lawn chair, and grab a seat.

Fifteen minutes pass by.

An hour passes by.

Two hours.

Three.

You fall asleep.

You’re awoken by a raindrop on your cheek. It’s 3 am, and it’s raining. There’s still lights on inside - the party is still going strong. And you’re locked outside your own house, getting soaked in the rain. You run to your neighbor's house and ring the doorbell, but no one comes. They’re already asleep.

Finally, around 3am, you give up. You fall, dejected, into a corner by the garden shed where there’s some shelter from the rain. Your body shivers with cold. Eventually, you drift off, not really into sleep, but simply because you don’t have any energy left to fight anymore. You slump down into a pile of flesh, a lonely man framed against the dark agony of a moonlit night.

Transcend: Serious Passion

Truth without emotion produces dead orthodoxy and a church full (or half-full) of artificial admirers (like people who write generic anniversary cards for a living). On the other hand, emotion without truth produces empty frenzy and cultivates shallow people who refuse the discipline of rigorous thought. But true worship comes from people who are deeply emotional and who love deep and sound doctrine. Strong affections for God rooted in truth are the bone and marrow of biblical worship
John Piper, Desiring God

Oh, how very true is that balance in our lives... in my life. I was talking about something very similar yesterday, doing training. Talking about presenting a worship set. There needs to be deep passion, but rooted in truth, otherwise it's nothing but cheesy. And the one label the church must avoid at all costs is "cheesy." We talk about the serious, passionate business of love, of life, of death and meaning. Besides these, all other pursuits - making money, being entertained - must fall by the wayside.

So let me issue a challenge to the readers: What is your serious passion? Why is it so serious? Why are you so passionate about it? If you're not passionate about something serious, then how do you get to tomorrow?

Transcend: A peaceful mind and trust in God.

How much do you trust God? Fully? Whole Heartedly? Now what do you think about in the course of the day? "I wonder if Sally likes me?" "I don't think I'm going to have enough money to pay my bills this month...I'm screwed!". "I hope I don't break my leg at work because how would I pay my bills, I'd be really screwed!", "I wonder where i'll be in 5 years?!?!?" CRAP!

We say that we trust God but yet we haven't learned how to put our minds to peace about ALL things in our lives. We think that there are those little things that God can't handle that we would be better suited to handle on our own.

I've been on my own personal journey this year to find inner peace and even though I'm not fully there yet I really feel like I'm well on my way. Yes I still sometimes have those bad days where I'm concerned about finances and there's some days where you can't shut your mind off but I would challenge you all to challenge your mind and challenge those "doubts" that arise in your mind as they come up because if those thoughts are still there, we haven't fully given all of ourselves over to God. May we pray for a peaceful soul, a peaceful mind, and a peaceful world!

Transcend: Worth

Who am I?

A question that tugs at the bottom of every soul.

What is worth, what is of worth?

We are made in the image of the Creator, blood, dust and bone. We are reflections of a singular and unfathomable will. We are the children of the Word that fell from His lips onto the world.

There is something inherently of value in us, of us, that we radiate. It is in what we are, it is in the unlimited potential of the DNA in our cells, we are the many, we are the variegated, and we are the host of possibilities. There is something of His eternity in the incredible manifold paths that the complexities of biology offer us.

And that is merely in our form, our shape, our dust. And He showed fit to give us something more. He gave us His breath, the animus, the soul, the ability to choose. He gave us choice. He gave us the capability of understanding.

A question then follows, regarding understanding. We ask, especially to the literal translation: If Eve knew, truly knew the fullest consequences of her actions, would she have bit into that apple? Would she have enslaved us, a world, to thousands upon thousands of years of pain and suffering? Would the mother of us all condemn us in a moment, for the sake of knowledge? And yet, to push the literal translation, even her limited understanding of a choice between God and self would mean that she knew of good and evil.

Regardless, there is something rotten at the core of us all. There is a malignity to us, and it colors every decision that we make. We are bent, and everything we do is thrown askew. Yet, I ask, are we broken, in the fullest sense of the word? Are we incapable of understanding altogether, that we are totally and absolutely lost? Would being this broken not even allow us to be capable of self-reflection? Would we not even know how broken we are, unable to answer the question to why we mess everything up?

Do we mess everything up?

A man called Tolkien said once, “We have come from God, and inevitably the myths woven by us, though they contain error, will also reflect a splintered fragment of the true light, the eternal truth that is with God. Indeed, only by myth-making, only by becoming a "sub-creator" and inventing stories, can Man aspire to the state of perfection that he knew before the Fall.”

But. But: Are we not the reflection of a God that is perfect? Are we not the refractors of a pure Light? Is there not something in us that calls to Him? Is there not something in all of us that recognizes we are the vessels of His Light, His greatness? Is there not some worth in that?

We see through a mirror darkly.

So: the problem. We can’t, being the instruments of our own destruction, engineer a way out that destruction. If we see sin as death, in and out of this mortal coil, a death in the little sense during our life, and a death after we pass, then we’re f*cked. It takes something to straighten us. It takes something to repair this “broken” soul.

It takes something like Jesus. For God so loved the world. Notice the language. Notice what it says. He LOVED the world. He saw worth in it. He saw something worthy of redemption. He saw something that needed to come back to Him.

It is true that we cannot manufacture this worthiness by anything we do, for in the end it falls short of its mark, it bends in its skewed flight, it misses the target. It is not complete, it is not perfect. But that we do, that we know, that we try, that very fact is from what we inherently are, the image of God. We seek after His face even though we cannot give the very search its words. We look for transcendence; we look for that purpose, engage in that passion that will deliver us to something better. Worth comes then, when we are our truest selves, an independent agent of the Will of God, spun into the world. We see this, in the image of who Jesus is, and what he’d done. The greatest thing a man can do is lay his life down for his friends, a free act of volition, not some prescribed fate. Our worth is immeasurable, for God took an immeasurably worthy Son and had him die for us. Our price has been the death of the Son of God.

Let us hold to the value of this worth, with humility and gratitude. For we are bought, purchased with a coin of infinite value.

Transcend: Fear

When I was about 11 or 12, I went to Malaysia with my family on vacation. We were staying with family for most of our vacation, but we also travelled to a remote seaside resort. My dad always loved sight-seeing, so we would often spend hours driving and walking to faraway destinations.

Upon arrival at the resort, my sister and I hurriedly changed into our swimwear and headed out to the beach. There was no one around, only a few people in the distance, and the water was kind of murky. My sister had her doubts, but I said, "It's fine, let's go in". So as I begin to walk in, I cut my foot on glass. At least that's what I thought.

As it turns out, I was bitten and poisoned. To this day we're not sure what it was (maybe a catfish), but I couldn’t have taken more than a few steps in. I told my sister to go and get a band-aid, but realizing the severity of the situation, she ran and got my parents. My mom instantly recognized that I was poisoned, and my dad carried me off across the street where – thank God – we found an English-speaking doctor. He had seen many injuries like mine before, and was able to administer antidote and pain-killer. Suffice to say I lived, but I remember the pain persisted for at least a full day.

From that day forward, I avoided stepping into any body of water other than a swimming pool. No lakes, no rivers, no ocean.

Then my mom told me that we were going to Hawaii for a family vacation this year. So when we finally arrived in Hawaii last week, I hadn't stepped into the ocean in roughly 14 years. It was deliberate avoidance. I didn't want to experience that kind of pain again.

But I decided to go in. I swam. I had fun. I feel like it had more symbolic and spiritual significance than any emotional significance. I didn't cry. I didn't leap for joy. But I broke the cycle. I left my fears behind, and they melted away in the beautiful oceans of Kauai. Truth be known, I was probably ready to go back in a lot sooner, but this was my first opportunity in a long time and I didn't want to pass it up. This time I didn't get hurt or bitten by any venomous creature. It was wonderful.

Understand, we can have fears about every imaginable thing. Losing a significant other. Going broke. Missing an opportunity. We are broken people, but God is putting us back together. God wants to restore all that was lost, and bless you beyond that.

Do you have fears from the past? I would encourage you to see it for what it really is and face up to it. Maybe you're not ready yet. That's okay, but your time will come. You'll be more than ready with God at your side.

Transcend: The Dynamic Fulcrum

Note: Full credit for this idea goes to Wayne Cordito, who presented it at The Leadership Summit some years ago.

Balance. The one thing we all seek. If you look at any system of belief, that's one of the main things it promises - self help books to help you balance your work and your private life. Feng shui to help your room be balanced. A system of karma that balances out the good and the bad in life.

Belief systems give us something to hold onto, something to balance our lives on - a fulcrum. And so we live our lives, striving for balance. Between love and logic. Between work and play. And we analyze, and carefully move things around, until our life is just right. Perfect! Balanced!

And then there's a shift. Because something didn't stay where we put it. Work is taking longer, the spouse is asking for more time, the kids are doing different activities, the guys have found that epic fishing spot that just HAS to be had this weekend.

So what do we do? Our natural instinct is to try and pile on more stuff to keep this thing balanced. We go on the fishing trip, get some roses for our jilted spouse with a card promising more quality time, put the kids' activities on the VISA, smile to our boss at mutter under our breath at our co-workers, and above all, present the image that we're expending not a single extra drop of effort in the process.

But there's a better way. Move the fulcrum. Life is dynamic - ever changing - if we think we're going to be able to work with it with a system that's based on keeping things the same, we're fighting the wrong battle already.

How does the fulcrum work? It's easy - natural, even. You move the fulcrum, which is your focus, towards the side that has the heavier load. That big project means you're going to be thinking about work more. And then, when it's finally submitted, you can move the fulcrum back over and spend an abundance of time with the family.

The problem comes when we fail to move it. That project finishes, but we're so used to spending 80 hours a week at the office for the past three months we're hesitant to ask the boss for a week of time off. We're mortally afraid of missing something important, and in being afraid, we miss everything important. We're trying to fit life into our perceptions, instead of using our heads and working the way life works.

When did common sense become so uncommon?

Transcend: Wise Mechanics

God speaks through all sorts of people - including bike mechanics.

Sometimes it just takes me a few weeks to get the message.

Earlier this summer, I went to the bike shop to get a new rear tire. While I was there, I talked to the mechanic about getting a new rear cassette (yep, the thing in the picture), complaining that I wanted a steeper ratio to help increase my top speed. I was expecting a "oh, we'd have to custom order that" or "yeah, but that's the racing model" or something like that. I was dumfounded by his answer.

"Um, they don't make anything faster then that."

"So what do I do? Get a bigger front chainring?"

"Well, you could try slowing down. Easier on the bike, and your knees, too, probably."

It was the last thing I expected. His job was to sell me bike parts - things that could make me go faster. And he was telling me to slow down? I mean, I haven't been passed on the bike paths in three years except for couriers and Olympic trainees, but...

And it took me until now to get it. This isn't about my terminal velocity as I scream down a hill. It's about a lifestyle. I keep pushing when I need to be able to coast. To store up my energy for when I need it. To appreciate the wind in my hair, the sweat on my face, and the scenery I'm hurtling by. I need to stop pushing.

"It never comes from pushing."

That's Alfred Hitchcock, apparently shutting down production at the end of the day when his actors were trying too hard to get the scene right. And the next day, after sleeping, they nailed it, first take. It never comes from pushing.

Special thanks to Mark Bucannan for letting me butcher his beautiful Hitchcock story.

Imagine. Inspire. Transcend.

Three words. Three powerful words. What do they mean? Well, if you're legalistic, you can use Websters. If you're instinctive, you've already decided what they mean (and if they're important). If you're average, you'll run out of attention span after the second one (they are, after all, surrounded by other words, and reading entire entires is so last year). If you're rare, and patient, you'll stick around and find out.

This is a beginning. And like most beginnings, it doesn't spring out of nothing. Just like the best stories have been told since the dawn of time, the best ideas have always existed in the minds of just about everyone. It's just now that some of those stories get written down.

Should you stick around? That depends. Do you value community? Do you work on a balance of art and commerce, freedom and justice, a pursuit of life, true life? Do you end up with better questions instead of answers when you ask?

If so, welcome.